There Are No Words

This post will contradict the title.

I wanted to post this while my feelings and thoughts were still on the surface and it will probably take me hours to word correctly. A day or two after something like this happens feelings get muted and numb. Some may wonder, why would you post this now? There must be something better you could be doing, why would you want to remember this? But there isn't anything else I could be doing, except waiting. I probably will get little sleep tonight and this is a way to release my feelings when I am trying to be strong for my family, is also keeps my mind on a steady track in order to collect my thoughts.

Tonight, my mother's boyfriend - i hate this word, it seems so immature and small - her love is what I will consider him in this post, was taken from her tonight, from us. Everyday we forget or put in the back of our minds the dangers of the job that most of our men and woman face.
I come from a small fishing community of Grand Manan Island. My mothers love, was lobster fishing when he went into the water without a sound and in the blink of an eye. There was nothing that could have stopped it or that the men he was with could have done. This was between 4:30pm and 5:30pm. As I write this sentence it is 12:20am Dec 21 2012 and there has been no sign. There is no way that we will ever see him walk through the doors again. The temperature of our oceans water this time of real is beyond breath-takingly cold, it is life-takingly cold, his chance of survival for a couple of hours would have been surprising. It has been 7 hours now. My mother knows that it's over, but she still has hope they may find his body. She is such a strong woman, I can only half image how she feels. George was family to me, but he was her love.

First off I would like to thank our amazing community.
The amount of boats that went to the scene to search for hours in the dark and cold. Except it was anything but dark. The power of over 20 vessels lit up the waters surface, 2 helicopters and countless flares in the sky sent light from above. I heard it looked like a city on the sea searching for a lost man. The search will end in a couple of hours.
Then there are the people from home that are waiting for news just like us. I truly believe that when one of our hearts breaks here on the island at least half of the communities hearts are heavily filled or cracked and broken as well. I want to thank you for all the kind words, thoughts, prayers and hugs from afar.
Second I would like to thank our amazing friends and family. That came to sit with us, cry with us and laugh with us when we don't feel like laughing. I have felt true love from many of my close and distant family members and friends. People I haven't seen in a long time and people I see every day. It is a small community, but with jobs and other everyday life, we drift apart and get caught up in what life is. It saddens me that we only come together at holidays and tragedies, I wish I could feel the amount of love I felt when we were all crammed into one house, everyday.
Third I would like to thank God, for being with all of us affected. I would still like to send an online prayer that you look over my mother and Georges family a few provinces away.

Some may ask why put God third? I have been struggling inside alot with my inner religion and at a time like this it is very hard to understand God's choices and decisions. I know I shouldn't be angry with him but I am. I am angry at many things right now. I remember to thank God and included him because I know everything happens for a reason, that it's all I know. Right now I have so many questions for God I could sit down and interrogate him for all the pain my mother is feeling. So yes how I feel right now, God is third.

It is now 1:30am and the rcmp officer just left our house. There wasn't much he could tell us or anything like that, he came to find out if there were any people we needed help contacting, but we have done the bulk of that ourselves. It was nice to sit with him and talk, even laugh. Most encounters with officers are tense and awkward, but this was friendly and comforting. ( I had to stop writing this post to speak to the police so times could be messed up a bit)

At the beginning of the night, when I first got the call about my mother's love, I thought, "Oh okay, he's fallen over and they've picked him out of the water and they'll sail in and have to take him to the hospital to check him over." With in minutes, those thoughts were hopes and grasps of wishes.

We just got our last call from the Search and Rescue, they have called off the search at 1:47am. I've had to watch my mothers heart break before my eyes. Not physically, but the pain on her face creates a mental picture I will never erase. As I listen to her cry in her room I can't help but wish I could take all her pain away. That I was a sponge that absorbed all sadness, I would rather feel it myself then to see her this way and hear her this way.

I am sad, but I am angry. I am heart broken that my mother has to have the agony of this inside her heart. After finally finding happiness again, she could only enjoy it for a short time before having it stolen from her. I am angry at God and do not understand his "plan" I know I will forgive him and have in ways already, but I am still angry. Like when someone wrongs you, and you forgive them, but you don't forget what they did. I feel my mother has been wronged.

I am angry at the greediness of our world. That these men risk their lives to make a living for their families and put food on our tables and other peoples tables, and people think they make large amounts of money, some do, but not average. The money hungry, top of the pyramid "buyers" make me sick. I feel like my mother's love died for $2.75 - 3.25 a pound. To me that doesn't amount to his life. He loved fishing, but just because he loved it, doesn't make it right that he lost his life for so little. I feel cheated. I feel like making the money hungry "buyers" go fishing on a small boat in the fall. Then ask them what they think they should be paid at the end of the day, or better yet a season.

Tonight, I was even angry at the snow. I hadn't seen much snow until tonight and I wanted the first time I stood outside in the snow to be a happy day. This was not a happy day. As I stood on my doorstep, after gathering my things to stay with my mother, I watched the snow slowly and softly fall from the sky. When tragic things happen and it rains, as I child I believe that God was crying. As I stood, I wondered, "what was snow? ... frozen tears for a fisherman lost in the cold sea? or was God trying to show me some beauty to the world that he had just flipped upside down for my family?" I didn't really care either way. I am angry and sad. It really doesn't matter.
I started to focus on single flakes falling and as I grew more angry, it seemed the snow fell faster. I wanted to lay out on my lawn and let it bury me. I wanted escape, I wanted denial.
To be honest, I lost hope very fast tonight. I knew what the outcome would be and accepted it long before I should have. They save have hope, be positive. I've never been a optimist, nor a pessimist, I'm a realist and I knew the odds. It was just the waiting game, for the search to end. I am forever thankful for those who searched for a body, for the closure for my mother and the rest of Georges family. But me, I don't need a body, but understand why others do. I realized that back in feb when I heard a dear friend from across the globe had drown. I didn't want them to find the body - they did and I'm happy they did for his family - but I would rather have believe he wasn't gone. That he had jumped aboard a ship and sailed to far off places and that someday, some where in the strangest and most random of places, I would catch a glimpse of his face and smile.
It isn't this way with George, but I still don't need a body to know the fate. It was more of a mystery with my friend, maybe because it was a different location, closer to shore, but in the middle of the bay, 2hr sail from shore. There is no swimming to land and taking off on grand adventures.

It is 2:08am and the house is silent. My mother is quiet, either sleeping or lying awake starring into a happier that once was her life. But the house is silent, except the clicking of my keys as I write this post. I think I hear my dog licking his puppy parts, but mostly it's quiet. I could probably ramble longer, but I think this post has done it's job. I have clearly thought my thoughts and written them to justify my feelings. I may never look at it again or I could daily for weeks, but I did it for release. I'm alone in the post and feel weight off my shoulders each sentence typed.

Usually I would sign "Stay Happy" but I am unable to in this dark time. Instead I will leave you with...



Thank you.

When Life Gives You Lemons, Say I Like Watermelon Better

Life has really been kicking me in the ass lately. I'm trying not to complain too much about it, because some pretty good things have been happening too. There are always three ways to look at things - positively, negatively and obliviously. I am trying to keep positive, but sometimes that can be really hard to do.

The past couple of days I've actually been in a pretty good mindset. Thursday I started staying at my house alone (I will get to why after) and spent some "me" time on getting some things ready for work and catching up on tv shows. Friday I put my tree in and decorated it, while also having it fall on top of me in the process. It really did look beautiful after it was completed. Saturday I woke up and got ready to head of to the annual Christmas Market that is held in our community every year, I spent alittle cash and headed home with a bag full of goodies. Once I arrived back home, I got this fantastic urge to clean. I re-arranged my pantry and cupboards, cleaned my kitchen, porch and laundry room. It didn't take me long and I felt awesome about what I had accomplished, I hadn't cleaned that much since I had moved in. 

Living alone has really made me not only bored, but it has seemed to free up some of my time. Instead of always cuddling on the couch watching tv shows, I'm wandering around the house looking for something to do. 

Now about why I am living alone. It's not something that I want to elaborate on too much, but most people know that Justin and I have our fair share of problems in our relationship, but we also have our own individual problems and issues. He is manic depressive and suffers from anxiety with a touch of bi-polar and I'm OCD with depression and weight issues. But we want to be together and we fight for and work together or try to atleast. Justin has an addictive personality and I have a high novelty seeking personality. So I am always searching for a change or something new when he is stuck on one thing. So he's gotten himself into a bit of a mess with alcohol and it's really become too much for me to help him control. I have a bad temper and because I don't understand why he can't just "stop" we always end up fighting and when he's been drinking, his temper isn't that great either. He's moved back to his parents so that he can hopefully get past this problem and we can eventually go back to living together. But with alcohol came the sneaking and the lying, which is something that I hate the most. I HATE lying and although I do it on occasion because I am not perfect, my guilt will eat me alive about it. But most of the time I just don't understand it, if a friend asks me to lie to someone for them, most of the time it ends up hilarious because I can't wrath my head around the reason someone would want to lie and then I can't come up with anything that would make sense to say. That's beside the point though, because of how many lies have been in our relationship lately, my trust is just about gone and it really hurts me to say that. I used to be such a trusting person and now I barely trust anyone. 

I stayed with my mother last night because of a life changing event for her, she got her very first computer...and I had to teach her how to use it. Although training has just begun, she does have an email, facebook and pinterest account and can work all those herself. So day one of training went well. I stayed tonight because today was a very "blah" day, I slept most of it and when I went home my beautiful christmas tree had fallen down and a bunch of ornaments were broken and I just was too aggravated to be home, so I locked up and came back down to my mothers after standing up and tying the tree off. Atleast I get to go through the fun of re-decorating my tree. 

Some good things that I've got going right now other than having my house clean and teaching my mother the ways of the "current world" I am working on a new project for work. As an educator in a daycare, we have to document what the infants and children do and learn, how they live their lives at daycare. It's my favorite thing about work, because I get to use my photography and photoshop skills at my job, which I didn't think I would get to use much, but I bring quite a bit to the table when it comes to documenting. Right now I am working on video documenting, when I quit art school to move back to my hometown I was learning about video. I had been really excited about it until the worst of my depression had hit and I stopped going to school or even getting out of bed. So I'm starting to teach myself and working on a few projects. The BG Club has video equipment, so maybe as I learn more I can start using some of their tools later on. 

My biggest news of all and probably the reason that I haven't given up after all this alcohol craziness (which by the way has made me hate booze and I have been sober myself since August, whoop whoop go me!) is TomTom. TomTom is a cerebellar hypoplasia kitten. A litter of kittens that the St. Stephen SPCA took in were affected by the disorder. Most of the kittens are mildly affected with very little displays of the condition, two of the kittens are moderately affected, TomTom being the most affected. What is Cerebellar Hypoplasia? They also call it drunken sailor or wobbler kitten, it affects the cerebellum in the developing stages in the womb. Sometimes if a pregnant cat is vaccinated during her pregnancy it can cause this disorder in her kittens, or if the cerebellum is damaged somehow during a kittens term in the womb. The kittens motor skills are affected and some kittens may have only mild tremors, moderate walking troubles or some kittens can have CH so severely that they will never walk. The one thing to remember about these kitties is that they are in no pain and don't realize they are any different from their fellow cats. Sure they do feel it when they bump into the wall or fall, but I don't have CH and I probably have more bruises and cuts than this kitten. 

I didn't plan on adoption another cat for a couple of years. I just took in a kitten from a local family and she was infested with fleas, so after cleaning her up and getting her back to a healthy kitten state. I said no more cats. Then I read about TomTom and it touched my heart in a way I can't explain, maybe it's because I've worked with special needs kids or on some level believe I'm kinda "special" myself. But I just had a feeling that TomTom was for me. I emailed right away, but felt the need to make sure that TomTom was adopted by me that I called the SPCA, you know I am serious about something when I pick up the phone and actually speak to someone. I HATE phone calls. So after waiting for paperwork to go through and cheques to be received they finally told me a week later that TomTom will be mine :) 

I was so speechless and excited when I found out. Yes my house is full of animals, yes I like it and no I don't care that you think I shouldn't have four cats, a dog and a giant bunny, but I do and I love them all more than I like most people. These days I have become a home body and keep to myself alot, those four cats, a dog and a giant bunny are my family. We share a 3bdrm house and although they don't pitch in on chores, I don't mind cleaning up after them, cause I love them. 

Here is a photo (right) and a video of TomTom. I am not sure what I am going to name him once he moves in, so I am just calling him what his name is at the shelter, I don't mind TomTom and maybe it will even stay that, but I want to meet him first before I decide on a name. For more information about CH cats visit HERE.

So far he has been able to take 10 steps without falling over, hopefully with practice and muscle development he will walk alittle farther as her grows. If he doesn't thats okay too, we'll love him anyway :)

Stay Happy! <3 and don't be afraid to adopt an animal with special needs, read up about there care and understand what they are dealing with, don't go over your head either! But animals with special needs deserve loving homes too :)

Happy Halloween!

I'm still not used to my life being so busy. The past couple of years I was just so slack with life and now that I have a normal one it feels like I never stop! I am making two different posts tonight, one about halloween and one about daycares. The obvious is that this is the halloween post.

I have NEVER been a fan of halloween...but now that I work with kids, I feel like a bit of a douche for not putting more effort into the occasion. I've had soooo many cute spooks here tonight, really I've only had 20 so far, and that's why I want to go all out next year. Light up the front yard and make sure that everyone stops in! Stock up on candy all year and then dish it all out! 

I didn't dress up myself this year, because I HATE dressing up and that's partly the reason that I didn't care for halloween. But really I want to make awesome costumes for next year. I did however, dress up my pom, Tinka, as a lady bug. She's such a cutie. She's never really been around kids, so I am trying to get her used to them slowly. She is nervous and will nip, but I've only seen her do it once the first time I babysat and the second time she was much better. 

I hope everyone is loading up on candy tonight, but and I'm having to keep myself out of it. I'm hoping to have a new weight topic blog post up soon and look forward to my house warming party post as well. Mind you, my weight post will be nothing inspiring due to the fact I've gained all of it back in my recent depression spell, but I'm not giving up and I'm gonna get back on track. No more excuses, even though I can come up with soooo many lol. 

Stay Happy and have a Happy Halloween! 

Whoa Whoa Whoa!

The time is finally here! I'm counting down the hours instead of the days...and I think this might even be the hardest art yet. I really wished I had the chance to meet the sweet older couple that had owned the place before me. I did the final walk through with the real estate agent tonight and there were notes in the kitchen from the lady to me about the different plants outside. It was so nice of her to fill me in on little things like that because I am in no way a gardener.

It's very hard for me to realize the actual state of the property right now, because inside my head is my dream of what it is going to be once I start working at it. Some people spend hundreds of thousands on a house that they don't have to touch, it's just ready. Although this house is fit to live in, it needs lots of updates and that's what excites me SO much about it. I get to make this gorgeous old house with TONS of character, into a home that is updated and very "me." Along with the notes the couple left mostly everything in the house, which to me is basically like getting 10 Christmases in one. These next few days are going to be pretty amazing. If anyone really knows me they know I have a huge appreciation for history and old items. Going through the walk through there were so many small vintage items that I was just overjoyed to have been left there. There is quite a bit of stuff that I won't be keeping, partly because I won't have the space and some of it I could care less for and need to sell so that I can get some money to do more renovating.

I can't wait to do some posts after I FINALLY get into the house. I am just too excited to even cope with life right now. I am watching Dexter re-runs and blogging about how excited I am. So I think I will post some inspiration photos of the rooms that I am going to paint.
Our bedroom is obviously the first room that I'm going to re-do, because the bedroom is where we have to feel the most comfortable, so I wanted to really make it feel like my own. Then I thought what other room in the house will we be using most, so I decided to do the livingroom along with the bedroom. 200.00 later after buying paint, I was glad I only chose 2 rooms. I'm hoping to get to the kitchen in the next month or so.

Here are some of my ideas for our bedroom :)

I love so many colors that I couldn't choose just a few, so I'm going with a boho-ish
style and using lots ofdifferent colors. My walls are going to be a neutral -grey-
 and one wall be a bright coral color. I have too many accent colors to do a
small pallet. 

grey - with alot of accents :) 

Lots of bright colors :) and I'm thinking of trying to hang fabric! 

Neutrals with bright colors 

Livingroom

This was the first photo that inspired my living room, the color isn't so blue that I chose,
but I didn't bring this photo with me to pick out mine, but I'm sure I will love my
 color as much as this :) 

Well that's in for now! All I have to do now is sleep, get up, go to work and then at lunch hopefully I will be able to get into the house and start cleaning and going through EVERYTHING!!! :) That's going to be the fun part, it's like a treasure hunt to me. I'm so excited. I will be doing lots of instagraming tomorrow! Wish me luck!

Stay Happy :)

Impatience

Its been alittle over a week since my last post and I really wished I would have posted more as my first house purchase progressed, but really it hasn't been anything exciting. Mostly just paper signing and banking and lawyers, oh and alot of pinning home decor ideas. This is mainly what my post will be about, I won't be able to do many changes to the house, but I have alot of plans for it and I want to post what I am thinking now, so that I can look back after they are finished and see how different it really turns out haha
Another reason I haven't been blogging is because I started in the nursery this monday and I'm working full time. This I am very happy about because I really need to get some cash built up before I move into the house.
I've noticed that I am not only impatient, but a symptom of my impatience is turrets. Atleast 10 times, if not more, a day I yell in weird voices "I want my house," because waiting 22 more days is going to literally kill me. I can't explain to you how impatient I am, it's too the point that I get angry that I can't move in yet haha, I just have SO much planned and know what I want to do that I just hate waiting to get it done.

I am also impatient for Katelynn and Rubyn to get back from their honeymoon so they can see their photos. I really hope they like them, here are a couple sneak peaks before I go on about my house!

Ideas that I have for the house 

The Porch

this color scheme            or               this color scheme

I really like the thought of being organized and neat like this

I think this is so neat! 

I am definitely having a trash station for garbage and recycles!

The Kitchen

I'm between a nice light and warm yellow or a light fresh green! I have no idea which to choose! I think I'm leaning towards the yellow though.

Some things that I would like to do in the kitchen. I really like the stand up draw by the fridge.

I would really like either of these types of store boards in my kitchen!

I am stopping at two rooms because I could go on forever and I am trying to do like 10 others things while blogging and I've been at this for 2-3 hours. I'm multi-tasking too much so I need to cut one things short and it's going to be the blog. But I will post more ideas soon! 

Stay Happy! 

Talk About Exciting!

HOLY SWEET LOVE MUFFINS! is my heart racing or what?! The past week has been so crazy, but the past three days have been absolutely intense. Where do I begin...

If you've been reading my posts, I've been blogging lately about growing up and trying to move my life forward because I'm a terrible procrastinator and when I'm not pushing myself I'm a lump on the floor. I've taken charge of my life and I'm going to make the most of it. I also blogged about my options for the future. Last week I was planning on building onto my mothers house next year to have my own spot, but then I thought more and realized I don't want to spend 50-75 thousand dollars on my mothers house until I save up enough money to get a place of my own AND pay off that loan. SO then I was left with buying land and building which means big $$$$ and just buying an existing house.

I started surfing the web and just checking out properties around the island and there were two specific ones that I was thinking about for next year. I made an appointment with the realtor to see my favorite of the two just for fun and hoped it would motivate me to keep saving and keep my focused. Instead I found out that they had dropped the price a significant amount and there had been others looking - which I had already saw because the house in on my way to work, that was on thursday. I got some information on what I would need if I were to put an offer down. Turns out because of my hate for credit cards ( which I think is a good thing ) isn't good for my credit, that meant I needed a co-signer. This is where my dad came in. On friday he went to view the house with me and was against my plan because he didn't want me digging a deathly hole of debt, which I completely understand. But I was persuasive and asked him to think on it over the weekend. On Sunday, I called again and he told me no again. Which I was even more upset about, but I did understand why he would say no, but at the same time just wanted the chance. I budgeted everything out to high prices of expenses and low incomes, not including savings and I still have money left at the end of the month. I really just wanted the chance, because I know that I'm not going anywhere, I moved away for three years and didn't really enjoy myself and ended up back here. This place is my home. After him and my stepmother had talked they decided I deserved a chance.
Yesterday I went to the bank with my Dad, got approved and then put in an offer for the house, signed the papers with a belly for of butterflies and began the wait. I've been going absolutely bat shit crazy waiting. And my realtor is definitely getting a kick of my enthusiastic behaviour toward all this and the fact that I want them to leave everything in the house, because I even love all their stuff - I am still hoping they will leave a pile of it behind because I love vintage things and it's basically all vintage.

So yeah, today all I've done is wait and get nervous, and then overly excited and then anxious because even if I get the house I can't move in until october, which just means MORE waiting and I don't think I can handle that. But I did get word that they do want to move the closing date forward if they accept my offer. I was supposed to get a call at 8, and it is now 8:01 and I'm typing like crazy just to keep my mind of it.

It's an old house, but I love old houses and it's all I've ever lived in and all I ever even looked for in an apartment. It has 9-10 foot ceilings, 2 acres of land that connects to my grand mothers property, a barn, a gorgeous lawn, a spiral stair case, 3 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms.

To help save money I have come up with the idea that I would take on a renter. Who might this be you ask? None other than my bio-bro, Jackson. I don't think I have come cross anyone except his mother that has thought we can pull it off, but I agree with her and think he deserves that chance and definitely needs to learn some responsibilities. I am not afraid to teach him some lessons haha. I think it will be pretty fun on the days we aren't fighting like real brother and sister. He is definitely a character and it will be a hard adjustment, but he's a good kid and I'll teach him the ropes for sure.

OMG it's 8:06 and I still haven't got a call. I also want to make an awesome shout out to all my family that has helped and supported me financially and mentally/morally. I'll post more about the actual house when I know for sure that it's mine. I probably won't even publish this until I know more.

8:09

It's 8:15 and I just bought a house!

Stay Happy!!!

ps. did I mention it has a walk in closet!!! bonus!

Trials and Tribulations

Geez, where do I even begin. Yesterday was just one of those days where everything seems impossible for the future and what was the present was crashing down around me. Note that things weren't very good for me on the inside because I had missed a depression med and started my period of the same day.

I've been trying to build up a realistic dream of what I want for the next year or so and I thought I had figured it out. I was planning on building a studio and mini apartment/reallybigbedroom onto my mothers place, because currently I just live is what was the "den" on the first level and for a couple to live in it there isn't much privacy. But it just seems that the more I look into it the more it's going on cost and I really don't want to spend that large amount of money on something that I just want to be temporary. I'm a very impatient person, so I am one of those girls that's always been in a rush to grow up, now that I'm here it's stressful but I like it, but I'm still wanting my life to progress further. I want to get my business going, a house built, a family started and I just don't know how to go about it.
Basically my options right now are 1. spend like 75000 and build on to my mothers house and try to live there until I pay it off...which isn't even really an option for me right now.  2. spend like triple that on buying land and building a starter home and 3. buying a house that stands and trying to make what I want out of it, which is looking like what I may have to do and go back to my land plan later. And oh yeah, I'm broke. I do have a full time job secured, but it's been set back after set back trying to get the nursery running. It's so depressing and hard to plan something that is so expensive when you have like the smallest percentage of what you need to get going.

So please if you're an islander and have some spare land or cash lying around, I'm not below charity at this point haha.

Back to yesterday, I was feeling very quite and just wanted to be left alone to mope about my lack of funds. I decided that I would read a book because I was getting quite excited for my birthday gift to arrive. My lovely boyfriend went all out and bought me the new nexus 7 tablet :) because I wanted alittle more than an ereader. I started to read a book that I had wanted to get at for a while and I'm alittle over half way through.

To make my day better, but lovely boyfriend came home and the drama begun, being a young couple with history and trying to work through the past while starting a future, I'm not ashamed to say we fight. We're both dramatic people and each of us have our own special communication problems. I'm loud and get upset easy and he tends to only hear what he wants and likes to exaggerate. So we piss each other off and make the fight bigger haha, but the good thing is we always sit down talk it through and move on from it.
The thing that I've learned the most from our 3yr previous relationship, 1yr break and now our new 5 month relationship is that I seriously love the guy. Even though we drive eachother mad sometimes or pis each other off and do things that we shouldn't, at the end of the day we're mad about each other and go to bed happy. I'm a big believer in never going to bed mad at each other, so I always make sure we talk things out no matter how late we have to stay up, I just can't lie next to someone that I'm angry at.

Yesterday wasn't all bad, things that cheered me up were that I'm doing pretty great at not chewing my nails. They actually look pretty nice, but how long that lasts I have no idea. I've done this before and chewed them after a couple months, but I going to try EXTRA hard not to this time.
I spent a few hours with my Dad and stepmom, we had lunch together and I also got to order my birthday present from Justin :) Yes I am one of those people that likes to pick out their own gifts - I'll probably blog about this control freak problem around christmas. The main reason I got this was because I wanted an ereader, but I kinda wanted alittle more than just an ereader, so I did some research and read alot of reviews and I think that I found what I want for the price we could afford.

 I'm so excited to get it!!! Thanks babe <3

A few other things were able to cheer me up yesterday and remind me that life's still good. I kept checking my phone and looking a a photo of me and one the cutest, sweetest little boys I know. I worked all day friday so I got to spend most of the day playing with him, his twin brother, older sister and all the other kids. Those little people are the best thing to cheer up a girl :) Here are some photos of the kids and things that I have been working on over the past week or so.

He can cheer me up no matter what's making me sad!! 

Last week mom and I tacked the jean quilt she'd been working on for
ages! 

Tinka wasn't that great a help, but she sure is the cutest :) 

Calli didn't want to reading yesterday, she actually hasn't left me alone
for the past two days... oh and she's allergic to Tinka's food and
over-grooms herself that's why she has a sore on her back :(
I'm going to try and construct a fabric collar to stop her licking.

This man always puts a smile on my face! 

Last weekend my friend Lisa came down with Jo to visit :) 

We went to see the alpaca's at Darren's house! (link to their cottage site
at the end!)

They have mini sheep too! 

All adorable animals!! 

I watched the rotary fireworks from the sea this year :)

The reflections on the water made it even more lovely! 

Friday at work Libby did and awesome job coloring her lighthouse!

All the kids love my iphone, but Sabe definitely loved taking selfportraits! 

Me and Lib :) 

 I've been meaning to make more posts or more frequent ones, but my life seems to be upside down half the time these days. But I'll try to do my best this week, I always think of good blog posts when I'm not in the blogging mood haha

Here's the link to the Darren's summer chalet :)

Stay Happy!!!

Photoshoots, Facepainting and Favorite Friends

I've been spending the past couple of days with my main squeeze girl, Cassidy, who has been home for a visit, hopefully next weekend I will be making the trip up to her place to spend a much needed weekend in the city with her. I've also been working ALOT between photoshoots and the boys and girls club. I also volunteered to help out with Cassidy at the Family Fun Day they had today. I am extremely tired and could have passed out hours ago, but I wanted to get all my blog posts and page updates done. So here's some of what I have been up to.

I went to get my hair touched up and freshed and thought my life needed some spontaneity so I got my second holes pierced and then a random third ball that you can see, but I am going to get in done the same place on my other ear, just wanted to make sure I liked it haha and it hurts. I also had a "blonde" moment and put nail polish remover on my ears instead of peroxide...THAT hurt. 

Spent some time at Kim's practicing face painting and playing with Keely.

Then we came back to my place and watched the L word. 

My awesome YOLO-pillar that Cassidy made me. 

At the booth

Turning our english teach from highschool into a pirate. 

The finished product! We miss this guy so much! 

My Hello Kitty mask 

I make a stunning Ariel!

And to top the day off Cassidy was thrown in Jail, where she said wasn't very comforting. 

Stay Happy!! and I have noticed what a complete mess this post is. The photos were just not working with me and after loading them all up just to hit a link and having to RE-load them, I was not impressed and too tired to fix everything :P Have a great weekend!!!

and here are some photos from a "Trash the Dress" shoot I did recently

Happy Canada Day!

I am definitely proud to be a Canadian and this weekend we did lots of celebrating as it wasn't only canada's birthday but my cousin was also celebrating her 17th birthday this weekend with the whole family. It was an awesome get together and for once we were all present for most of it. My family is pretty close and what I mean by family is my grandparents, mother and her two sisters and all the grand kids. I also had a BIG yardsale that I went to, I mentioned in another post that I had been to a yardsale not too long ago and bought some really nice glass bottles and some other items, I may not have mention and meant to. I am a huge yardsale fanatic and would seriously buy everything I needed from a yardsale rather than new from the store, most things anyway. I'll post some recent yardsale finds in this entry. 

So appreciative that a few parents have given me permission to use photos of the  kids for work!
They are all sooo adorable. The art work is something the kids put together for summer
 this past week, some pretty flowers and busy bees! 

Friday night a bunch of family and some friends got together to celebrate Megan's
birthday! Top: My aunts and I, Tonia- or as I refer to her as BioDad, Claudine
and then Myself.  Bottom: a few of old friends and family with a
couple of new friends. 

Top - Bottom, Right to Left. Matt building us a fire, Papa enjoying a s'more, Megan and Abbie, Papa setting off roman candles,
everyone sitting around the fire, again - we did this for the past three nights. Everyone out for a family walk at sunset, and today
we moved couches in the heat and BioDad was a bit crunched up in the back. 

Fireworks in the yard! :P don't worry we had a fire fighter in the family haha

There was alot of food involved this weekend.

We like to do a lot of things together as a family, including walks, lamp lit grass basketball and
shaving heads. Megan and I took it upon ourselves to shave Jackson's head, neither of us have
done it before. How hard can it be? It's not like we could mess up haha

My Dog T-Bear shed's awful! He's a ShepardxHusky and the hair just falls off him all year. He looks
much better after the brushing! 

A neighbor and friend has a ton of kittens at their house that are just tooooo cute. I wish I could take them
all or even one but I have too many animals. The little white one is the runt and she is so dainty and cute,
 then this guy on the right is a little fluffy thing but has a rat tail :P I'm excited to see how it looks
as he grows up. 

Mayor is a bit of an escape artist so when he got out again we decided his
new cage NEEDED to get built, so my mothers boyfriend was so nice as
to build out. Right as it was finished we got a tip of where Mayor had been
spending the afternoon and were able to catch him. 

Tinka is re-united with her bestie in his new pen! He likes it and hates it
at the same time, at first he thought he could go right through it, but has
given up on that now. In the bottom picture you can really tell where
his ear was broken, probably from being picked up by his ears as a baby

The first photos is the bird feeder that I bought at the yardsale for $2. I brought
it home as a project and wanted to do it right away. So I painted it up and
hung it outside of the house :) 

Bought a bunch of old camera equipment :) I collect this stuff if anyone has things they don't want!
Just hinting :P 

I love colored glass and I couldn't resist these beautiful bottles.

The photo doesn't do the plates justice. They're from Egypt but I don't know anything else about them. 

Those are some of my yardsale finds, but there are LOTS more that I've collected over the past couple of weeks. This weekend I also bought two cushioned chairs and an antique baby crib. I have a bit of a problem when it comes to buying things at yardsales. Some stuff I buy to fix up and sell, now to later. 

Overall I had a great weekend of festivities and spending money. 

Stay Happy!