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Sunday, 24 June 2012

Numbness And Pain At Once

The past couple of days have been alittle rough, for the people around me and for myself. Friday night I went out to this GORGEOUS house at the back of the island. The owner is a wonderful sweet woman who is gorgeous herself and has wonderful taste and style! There were six of us women, I being the youngest and feeling a bit immature, but that was my own insecurities and worries. The women welcomed me and didn't pay any mind to my age difference. It was a perfect evening of laughs and wine along with a broccoli bread treat representing certain parts of the body ;) haha Later in the evening a friend got a disturbing text that soon turned the evening into confusion and sadden hearts for our friend. As the night turned into very early morning feels changed to anger and support. This woman is one of the kindest, sweetest and most beautiful and viewed as the perfect wife. She never deserved the blow that her husband mistakenly texted her over the girls night. She has been through more than anyones share of hardships in her life and she's pushed through it all, she's independent, smart, strong, and calm - even when we all expect her to go psycho and for good reason. She'll make it through this, but she will need her friends and family to catch her when she feels weak <3

Yesterday, I slept in and bummed around the house most of the day, working away at photos and cleaning, along with some pinning and watching tv shows. My mother and I decided to go out to camp for a girls night with our dear friend and some of her family. It was a great night of laughs, food and nostalgic talks of the past. I enjoyed listening to the stories of the older woman of their childhood and "younger" years.

Photos From Yesterday

kinda bored waiting to go to camp

my calli's been fighting with her ex

we aren't normal.

or I'm not anyway

ready for raining dark harbour

Dark harbour

ladies <3 

I came home from camp and picked up the mail at midnight and my parcel had arrived. A few weeks ago I had ordered old photos off of I collect camera's and photos, especially old cameras and photos. I love most vintage items, but being a photographer I love old photos. They are someone's memories and moments from their life and I like to look at the photos and think of who these people were, good or bad, what were their secrets?,  jobs?, fears? and lost more. 

And now for the part of my weekend that I hated most. When I was 12 or 13 I was diagnosed with migraines and for years in highschool I would get one to three migraines a month. I would lose my peripheral vision and have blind spots in my eyes, numbness in my fingers and lips, then the pain for start and I could be out for a couple of days each time. Some people didn't believe me, including my parents at first. My mother started to believe me the first time I lost feeling in my right arm. I couldn't move it very well and it felt like stone or that it wasn't there at all. It was just my fingers to my elbow. I have been known to be a drama queen at times, but I have been through alot of painful things, dry sockets after my wisdom teeth were removed. My parents didn't believe me so they went untreated for 2 weeks. I don't blame my parents, because when I was a child I had to have a band-aid for every cut and bruise. And illness made great excuses for skipping school when I got older. But they were no excuse and when people would say things to make me believe that they didn't think I was being honest about the condition, I would wish they could understand how REAL migraines are. But I never wanted to wish that pain upon anyone. I've put myself through alot of shit, scooter accidents, dry sockets, nerve damage, tonsillitis and so many other things but migraines are by far the scariest and most painful. 
I have been on meds to try to prevent them and keep them at bay for a few years now and so far it works, I used to have two or three a month, now I have two or three a year. But when I have one it's big.
I had one of these last night, I woke up around 4, tossing and turning in pain, but I'm very disoriented when I wake up with one. I made justin go get my mother because I wasn't quite sure what was going on. Most of my vision was gone, but I could make out pieces of things, and my right arm all the way up to my elbow was numb and stone like. I didn't have much of a range of motion with it. Then my left did the same and I lost the feeling in my face and throat. I lose my speech as well, my words or slurred or backwards and I can't make full sentences. I sounds hilarious, but it's quite frustrating at the time :P 
I know there are MANY others out there that share the same condition I do, I just want you to know that you aren't alone when you're head is hurting sooo bad that it's painful to put a cold cloth to your forehead or lie your head on a pillow. Others know what you are going through. 

Stay Happy and Healthy! 


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